9 hours ago • 166,163 notesReblog
deductivereasonable:

h34rken:

put a fucking bag on your head and sleep you god damn piece of shit

take a nap on a fucking ski lift
The Fault In Our Stars by John Green (Page 280)
  • Hazel:Touch the cave wall.
  • Computer:You touch the cave wall. It is moist.
  • Isaac:Lick the cave wall.
  • Computer:I do not understand. Repeat?
  • Hazel:Hump the moist cave wall.
  • Computer:You attempt to jump. You hit your head.
  • Isaac:Not jump. HUMP.
  • Computer:I don't understand.
  • Isaac:Dude, I've been alone in the dark in this cave for weeks and I need some relief. HUMP THE CAVE WALL.
  • Computer:You attempt to ju-
  • Hazel:Thrust pelvis against the cave wall.
  • Computer:I do not-
  • Isaac:Make sweet love to the cave.
  • Computer:I do not-
  • Hazel:FINE. Follow left branch.
  • Computer:You follow the left branch. The passage narrows.
  • Hazel:Crawl.
  • Computer:You crawl for one hundred yards. The passage narrows.
  • Hazel:Snake crawl.
  • Computer:You snake crawl for thirty yards. A trickle of water runs down your body. You reach a small mound of rocks blocking your passageway.
  • Hazel:Can I hump the cave now?
  • Computer:You cannot jump without standing.
  • Isaac:I dislike living in a world without Augustus Waters.
  • COmputer:I don't understand-
  • Isaac:Me neither. Pause.


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9 hours ago • 295,266 notesReblog
9 hours ago • 4 notesReblog
9 hours ago • 93,197 notesReblog
visvxl:

Manhattan at 6 a.m.

toomanyfandomssolittletime:

toomanyfandomssolittletime:

its really hard being a Hindu, because i wanna taste beef but i can’t because of religion. damn.

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wAIT WHAT

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mY SKIN IS WHITE???

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I’M NOT INDIAN???? I’VE NOT BEEN A HINDU FOR 16 YEARS BECAUSE MY PARENTS ARE ALSO HINDUS??

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cAN I FINALLY STOP WORSHIPPING COWS?!?!?!!

(via theaadventureye)


Posted: 9 hours ago205,424 notesReblog
11 hours ago • 9,575 notesReblog
11 hours ago • 33,908 notesReblog

sexybritishllama:

my neighbours are having a pool party again and they have music playing and first they were playing im a believer and i was like okay but then accidentally in love came on and i was like wait a minute and now theyre playing all star they have the fucking shrek soundtrack playing for their pool party gdi

(via theaadventureye)


Posted: 11 hours ago560 notesReblog
13 hours ago • 34,814 notesReblog
explorrre:

by Justin Amoafo Photography